“But when a saga popular with pre-adolescent girls peaks romantically on a night that leaves the heroine to wake up covered with bruises in the shape of her husband’s hands — and when that heroine then spends the morning explaining to her husband that she’s incredibly happy even though he injured her, and that it’s not his fault because she understands he couldn’t help it in light of the depth of his passion — that’s profoundly irresponsible.”—
Today I learned something and I’m still recovering from it. For the 10 or so years that I’ve known how to use punctuation I’ve always felt confident in my apostrophes, ya dig? It’s doesn’t equal its, etc. So when we reviewed it in my college class (yeah, shut…
Like when women decide not to give a shit about certain feminist issues because “it’s so much better than it used to be.”
Really? So, if I took a huge shit on your carpet and someone cleaned half of it up, would you be totally okay letting my shit continue to rot in your living room because “the shit pile is smaller than it used to be?”
The “Occupy” movement, whether displaying itself on Wall Street or in the streets of Oakland (which has, with unspeakable cowardice, embraced it) is anything but an exercise of our blessed First Amendment. “Occupy” is nothing but a pack of louts, thieves, and rapists, an unruly mob, fed by Woodstock-era nostalgia and putrid false righteousness.
(Oakland “embraced” the protesters? How do you hug somebody with tear gas?)
No, fuck you, you misogynistic asshole. Talk to me when you are raped, beaten, harassed, killed, knocked down, denied access to basic healthcare, and shamed for doing something or not doing something because of your sex. And don’t even get me started on how horribly trans* individuals are treated for not falling into the binary gender spectrum.
Your attempts at saying you’re oppressed are really adorable.
But go fuck yourself.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE WHITE MEN??????
WHO SPEAKS FOR USSSSSSSS?????
(all my white male creys)
Oh for fuck’s sake.
I am so sick of this “Men have privilege so they are never allowed to talk about how patriarchy fucks with them too” bullshit.
Yes women and trans* individuals have it worse.
But guess what.
All of those things this anon mentioned?
They are fucking real problems and contrary to popular belief caring about them doesn’t mean that I think women have it all sunshine and roses.
I am so fucking tired of this condescending, insulting, and yes, misandristic rhetoric.
I’m jumping in on this because it’s aggravating to see. Listen, just because men are privileged, does not mean that they do not and can not run into these problems in day to day life or have their life affected by them.
Just because I or a lot of other men complain about these things does not mean they think they have it worse than women or that it somehow invalidates issues women/those who identify as women face.
As I understand it, feminism addresses these problems as well because they are ALL part of the patriarchal society we live and need to be fixed if anyone is to be truly equal.
Am I a white male, yes, am I aware of my privilege, yes.
You know what else, I was in an abusive relationship for YEARS and was afraid to talk to anyone about it. I argued with my therapist when she initially told me I was being abused. That was until I was brutally physically assaulted by my ex-wife in front of my children, only to have her tell me if I called the cops that they’d laugh at me, and that she’d tell them that I was actually the one who hit her (even though I had a bloody nose).
I recently was legally robbed of over $2,000 by family court.
When my ex-wife filed for food stamps after getting pregnant with her 5th child, family court took it upon their self to assume that she had custody of all four children and didn’t bother to look at the custody agreement or the divorce decree.
When I went to fix it, I was lied to, given improper information, conflicting information and finally told that I could not apply a reduction in child support retroactively, that they could not recover the over-payment from my ex and that this was all somehow my fault.
Okay, lets go to another issue. I had an ex-girlfriend that used to gaslight the shit out me, constantly. I had MAJOR shit going on in my life at that time too and if I had any kind of emotional reaction to anything, I was called a “fag” and “emo-fuck” and told I was acting like a “drama queen” or “woman”. Both my ex-wife and this woman on several occasions told me to act like a “real man” if I ever got shook or depressed about ANYTHING going on in my life. My ex-wife took as far as to tell me to “get over it already” a week after I sat next to my grandfather and watched him die in front of me.
Denied healthcare? With all the BS that just happened with family court I can’t even afford healthcare.
I have been shamed by an ex for being “too sexual” and for “having too many partners”.
And I don’t even want to get into the sexual assault part of this, but other boys and step parents can do some fucked up things to people.
Does all this mean that all of a sudden the inequality that women and those who identify as women all of a sudden goes away, no, not at all. Does that mean that I think I somehow have it worse or that I am oppressed, no, not at all.
But I do think there should be awareness of these types of attitudes and things that can happen to men as well.
We do get a lot of pressure put on us, we are expected to work until we drop dead, never complain about it and be stoic mountains of strength at all times, maybe not by ALL other people, but it is a VERY common mindset.
All of this doesn’t mean I deny my privilege as a male, nor does it diminish any other struggles that non-privileged people go though.
It is simply a fact that it does happen, and there should be an awareness of it, because actually, it’s ALL part of the same problem.
The people above who said that it’s all part of our patriarchal society are absolutely correct.
Ladies, don’t tell men their problems aren’t legitimate because they have “privilege.” Because if they don’t fit into what our culture says a man is, then they don’t have that privilege (and even if they do fit it, it’s not easy to stay there). I really don’t think I should have to be explaining this to a feminist…
Dudes, real feminists understand the issues men face, too. Feminism is not at all about gaining power over men. It’s about finding equality for men, women, and anyone else who might not fit those categories.
To everyone, don’t turn discrimination into a pissing contest. It’s not about who has more or less “privilege” in our culture. It’s supposed to be about acknowledging and finding solutions to the inequity we all know exists.
Ugh, I typed all this and probably no one will ever see it…
“Fashion is one of the very few forms of expression in which women have more freedom than men. And I don’t think it’s an accident that it’s typically seen as shallow, trivial, and vain. It is the height of irony that women are valued for our looks, encouraged to make ourselves beautiful and ornamental… and are then derided as shallow and vain for doing so. And it’s a subtle but definite form of sexism to take one of the few forms of expression where women have more freedom, and treat it as a form of expression that’s inherently superficial and trivial. Like it or not, fashion and style are primarily a women’s art form. And I think it gets treated as trivial because women get treated as trivial.”—Fashion is a Feminist Issue: Greta Christina (via heyicanbetheanswer)